DNR?

Facing death is a very scary idea in our society. Most people don't want to talk about it, hear about it, watch it happen, or have it happen to them. This a serious matter though because eventually, we will all die. While we may not have to think of it as much in our younger years we should still understand how to cope and deal with it. Expressing to your loved ones what you want if you were in a situation where death is inevitable is extremely important. Once you loose the ability to express your wishes someone may make the wrong decisions for you. It is also imperative to talk to your relatives about their wishes. Knowing what your parents or grandparents want will make it easier on you because the decision will already be made and you won't have to do it. By discussing all of these issues beforehand, one can have the death that they want. If pain medications are involved we should be educated about their main effects and side effects. If hospice care is offered we should know exactly what this care consists of. While no one wants to see their loved ones slip away from them, we have to be prepared for when this happens. I think that people should be knowledgeable about what is out there to help give them support in times like these. By being taught how to communicate with a dying person you can have a much more pleasant experience than if you are afraid of what you say might be wrong. I think that we can all experience death (of ourselves and others) in a positive light in some sense. Once we learn to accept reality I think we will all be a lot better off.

But I might Die Tonight

Reading about the stages of grieving described in the article let me put names to stages of grief that I have seen numerous times or experienced myself. I see people grieve all the time as I work in a nursing home and people frequently pass away. The family members that come in are sometimes struck with disbelief or anger and frustration. Sometimes they are even grateful if their loved one was suffering or in pain. Seeing spouses grieve is usually different than other members of the family. They may have been coming in and visiting with their husband or wife everyday for an extended period of time. When this person passes away the spouse has to figure out how to live and define themselves without their partner. The grieving process described in the book is more or less accurate. I think that some people may go through the stages in a different order but they more or less go through them all. The tasks of mourning are also important in the grieving process. I would think that the most difficult one would be to let yourself experience the pain of grief. Sometimes people don't want to accept the facts so they try not to grieve. If we don't grieve properly we are only putting off this painful process even longer and making it harder for ourselves to move on.

To retire or not to retire...That is the question!

The article showed many options an older adult has when they decide to leave the workplace all together or to partially leave the workplace. It was great to see that so many people can choose one of these six options and usually be satisfied with their life. It makes sense that the people who returned to work because of financial reasons would be less satisfied because they are basically forced to keep working to keep living. An older adult who decides to volunteer or do leisure activity's will untimely be more satisfied. I think that older adults should be able to relax when they retire and not have to be forced back to work in order to keep surviving. They worked all their lives and made money and it seems unfair that they would have to keep working. If they want to work to feel like they are still a productive member of society then that is fine. That is a personal choice though. While everyone is different and all feel differently about what they do after they retire we should look at those who have to keep working and see why they have to do that. If there is some way that we can help out an older adult so they can at least have a semi-leisurely retirement I think many people would benefit.

It's all about the $$...

Financial elder abuse is often looked over when discussing abuse of the elderly. While it may be less common it is certainly no less serious. People work for a good portion of their lives in order to earn money to live comfortably for the rest of their lives. When people get older and their hard earned money (sometimes all they have left) is suddenly taken away from them by someone else it is heartbreaking. The article mentions that financial abuse is often performed by family members of the elderly person. This makes it even worse because the older person may feel they cannot stand up to their children or other relatives. Financial elder abuse should be punishable by law. There is no reason people should get away with stealing from anyone let alone the elderly. I think that people need to be more aware of what this form of abuse is and know the consequences of it as well. Health care professionals should be trained to recognize the signs of financial elder abuse and not to ignore them. This may make it easier to catch people who think they can do this to their family members. Right now I think it is hard to catch because a lot of it goes under the radar and happens in homes. If the public is also educated then they can be aware of what is going on around them and see the signs as well. As the population ages this may get worse if we don't stop and recognize it right now.

Respect Your Elders

Examples of agesim and age-based racism are prominent in our culture. We have created such a fear of growing older that younger generations are mis-guided about this natural part of life. The language we use, the pictures we show and the messages we see all turn aging into something ugly and negative. I see this everyday whether it be in commericals or normal conversation. I think that as a society we are very dis-respectful to our elders when in fact, we should treat them with great respect for what they have done for us. We must somehow break this illusion that aging is wrong. A natural part of life is death and sooner or later we have to deal with it. I work in a nursing home and I often get asked "how do you do it". How can I stand to work with the old, the sick and the dying. I respond to these questions by explaining that someone has to take care of these people and that someday I might be in a situation similar to theirs and we all need to help each other. I explain to them that I want to make their last years, months or even days the best they can be. Some people I work with are not as compassionate as I am and treat their job like any other job. This frustrates me because this is when I see the disrespect and intolerence. Just because someone needs help does not make them less of a human being than you or I. Personally, I am going into a field to work with the elderly population so that I can do as much as I can to help the people of our aging population. Maybe someday we will be able to shed more light onto this sorry state we are in right now and start realizing that everyone is worthy and desrves to be treated with dignity.

Do you remember?

I think that Alzheimer's disease has to be one of the most devastating diseases that we face today. It doesn't attack you in the most physical sense like Parkinson's or Huntington's disease does but, it attacks your mind. It seems like once you lose your mind you lose yourself and are just left with a shell of what you used to be. The research done on this disease reveals the strange and complex ways that the brain can malfunction which basically causes it to self destruct slowly over time. We know enough to about Alzheimer's to slow it effects in the early stages and I think that someday we may even be able to reverse some of the later stages. People who are about to enter old age have a right to be a fearful of this disease. I think we need some educational programs to teach people what Alzheimer's disease is, what the symptoms are, and to re-assure them that everyone forgets things from time to time. This may even be helpful for researchers to get a better sense of what normal aging looks like and what happens when aging is abnormal by speaking to the people who attend these educational sessions. As far as early detection goes, I think that should be treated like any other early detection test of a disease. If someone wants to know what their percentage is for getting Alzheimer's then they can go and find out. However some people may not want to know what their fate may hold for them and that should be respected too. If I had to make that decision I probably wouldn't want to know. Knowing myself I would want to enjoy life instead of ruminating about what was to come for me eventually.

Heaven on Earth

The idea of an Eden Alternative almost seems too good to be true. In a world where nursing homes are run according to strict and often times carefully monitored guidlines we can hardly think of a nursing home being taken over by animals and children. Working in a nursing home myself, I can see what they mean in the article by describing these facilities as un-friendly and life-draining. Eden Alternative programs are a great way to bring life back into these nursing homes today. I think that animals, children and plants are positive solutions to bring something new into nursing homes. I can also see that these are not the only changes that need to occur. Changes from all areas of these institutions would be required for permanent change to come. Bill Thomas and his wife are taking the right approach to intrducing The Eden Alternative to facilities across the country. The process is slow but if they went any faster I think nursing home administrators would be overwhelmed. It is true that all of the staff need to be commited to change to an Eden Alternative program before the program is implemented. If one staff member does not go along with the changes then there will certainly be a hault in progress. By creating these special environments for our Elders we can help them age in a more positive light. I hope in the future we see more nursing homes using the Eden philosophy and creating wonderful sanctuaries for the aging members of our society.